There were a lot of things that I anticipated on this trip, but I'm not sure that I was more excited or anxious or nervous or beside-myself about any of them more than meeting him. The boy who I now call son and who will join our family soon.
I met him as soon as our boat arrived at Adovepke. I will never forget seeing him waiting for us on the shore as our boat pulled closer. I could recognize him easily, even from 50 yards away. It was like my heart knew him.
And let me tell you that my heart did some serious beating when I first laid eyes upon him.
I had no idea what the moment would be like. I had prayed about it for weeks--begging the Lord to bind us together with a love that only He could initiate. But, I just didn't know. The Lord graciously protected me from expectations.
However, if I had had any, they would have been blown out of the water.
I cannot put into words what happened in my heart and in my head when I met him. When I touched his face and rubbed his sweet head. When I hugged him.
I melted, and every fiber of my being knew that this was right.
I have no words to accurately describe the moment, but the tears that threatened to spill over remind me that I don't have to have beautiful words.
I just know.
As the time wore on and we were able to spend more time with him and observing him, I felt my love and commitment for him growing. Each time he would find us in the room and smile {which he does all the time and it's amazing!}, my heart would beat just a little faster.
And that little piece of my heart is still with him in Ghana now.
I am more certain than ever before that he was meant to be in our family. I know it's going to be hard. HARD.
I know he won't always be smiling that mega-watt smile, and I know my heart will beat faster for reasons that aren't so fantastical. However, this little boy is part of our story, and we are part of his. For forever.
Meeting him changed me and my heart. If I thought I was ready to be his mommy before, I am certain of that now. Pray for us as we wait. Pray for him as he waits.
2 comments:
Hey Stacy! I don't think I've ever commented on here, but I just want to let you know that I love reading about your sweet family. And, I've loved reading your latest Ghana posts. This one, where you met your son, brought tears to my eyes. He is so precious and I can't wait to see what God is going to do in His life.
Aja
i can hear your heart emotions as i read your words. thanks for sharing your experience. Hope you have met the Pourrajabi family in CS that have adopted two girls. if not, look them up!! they have had the girls a couple of years!!
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